I am General Wattle, floridly engaged in the Excess Weight wars. The enemy is the Chocolate ripe/ Barbecue crisp alliance and they must not be allowed to win the battle of Januberry.
A cunning plan is needed. Some trained peppercorn soldiers in tomato uniforms will be deployed to the front lines.
Many more meals of pan fried lean chicken, steamed broccoli, beans and pumpkin will be required to win.